Looking Forward To Seeing


You in Black Rock City!

Welcome home!

But first I need to fleece your wallet.

Fuck me.

$541.10.

Yikes.

But.

Fuck it.

What’s a few bucks?

I would regret it so much if I didn’t go, I’m supposed to be there and there is the off chance I may be given a ticket anyway.

I won’t count on it, that’s a great way to cop a big fat resentment.

But should it happen.

I will sell the one I just bought and use that money to buy myself a nice tent.

That was my compromise to myself when I was looking at the money.

And I have it in savings.

I would have to dip into my prudent reserve, but fuck it.

I am only living once, I want to live it fully.

Besides.

When I think off all the fun that I am going to have.

I mean.

It’s going to be a very different experience for me not working the event.

I mean, what the fuck am I going to do without having something or some kind of job out there define me and my experience?

I might just go to Burning Man for reals.

And although I am not able to go for the full event, I will still be getting four possibly five days of the event to experience.

Which is also more than I have had to experience in years.

Granted I have been up on very long runs, 21, 22, 23 days in a row.

Working always and having very little time off.

Coming back destroyed from the event, exhausted, sick, crazed a little, wondering why I did it again this way.

I’m quite curious to see what it will feel like to be completely autonomous at Burning Man.

To not be on a schedule or tied to camp, to come and go as I please could be really fucking fun.

That’s not to say that I haven’t had fun my other events, I have, I have had a lot of fun, I have also worked my fucking ass off and broken down a few times.

Emotional catharsis is a good thing but it does’t have to be a big burden of the event for me.

I want to go and be free and easy and breezy and light and bright and all things wonderful.

Oh I know.

There’s going to be dust and tiredness and crazy emotional swings, that happens but there is possibility here that I haven’t had before and a kind of joy, such joy, that I get to go.

There a plenty of folks who don’t like the way the event has changed or won’t go anymore or feel like something has been lost, or God, it was better last year, but I don’t feel that way.

I still feel like a kid in a candy shop with a handful of coins ready to buy my hearts desire for a few pennies.

Plus.

So excited to see friends that I really only see when I am out there.

The great big dusty family reunion.

I’ve started taking some actions toward finding a ride.

I did explore the ride board on the event site a little, but I’m hoping to catch a ride within the community of my fellows who are going.

I got one offer, but he was going up days earlier than I and staying all the way through the event.

I suspect I am going to have to get a ride up with one person and get a ride back with another.

Not that many people will be leaving the event Wednesday, and though I don’t want to leave that early, I do have school to be going to and the Mike Doughty concert with my friends Thursday night, and at least the drive out won’t be a grid lock of cars.

I will hopefully get all the dust off me so the audience doesn’t spend it’s time sneezing during the show.

I posted to a couple of camps that I used to camp with and have friends at, but aside from the one offer, nothing more yet.

It will fall into place.

I know it.

And for tonight.

I don’t have to figure it out.

I did the big action, even though I balked for a moment, I took the action, and I bought the ticket and vehicle pass–the taxes and the vehicle pass bumped up the price, the ticket is $390–I’m hoping that I can offer the vehicle pass as incentive to get a ride.

Anyway.

It’s done.

I’m going.

And for the rest of tonight I’ll just be thinking about my outfit for tomorrow night.

I’m going to see Diana Ross!

I got a message asking me if I wanted to go and got me and a plus one and got free tickets and I asked a friend from school and he said yes, so I’ll be heading to the Orpheum Theater tomorrow night after work to see the lovely and supreme Ms. Ross.

I joked with my friend about how big I was going to try and get my hair.

Unfortunately, though, I’ll be arriving via scooter and will have helmet head.

But that won’t stop me from throwing it up in a big messy bun and sticking a bunch of flowers and shiny things in it.

Plus.

Ahem.

My disco platform shoes that I bought in New Orleans?

Oh yes.

Those will be coming out of the closet.

I have to be fabulous.

It’s Diana  Ross for fuck’s sake.

There is not excuse to not be.

In the name of love.

So apt.

So true.

So excited to see my life unfold, big and bright, wild and huge.

A little like Diana’s hair.

Heh.

Luckiest girl in the world.

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