Posts Tagged ‘The Flaming Lotus Girls’

The Ball Was

April 19, 2015


A ball.

I mean.


It was just smashing.

Lots of fire.

The Serpent Mother was amazing, thank you Flaming Lotus Girls, thank you so much, and it was such a nice treat to be outside underneath fire sculpture, the flames leaping and hissing, the steel tig welded just so, the soft, warm embrace of the air rushing over my skin, it was luscious.

To be outside in a dress with my hair up and flowers and birds in it, well, that is a good night.

Add two wonderful girl friends and some really good music (huge props to CPTN JAY of Airpusher–hella tight, catch it on for an amazing set of deep house), and just lit my heart right up.

“This is God,” I mouthed to my friend.

This is God.

Thank you God.

For music and fire and dancing and art.

For joy in my body.

For feeling connected and right with my world.

Really right in my world.

I got to hang with girl friends and download the recent adventures and misadventures in dating.

I got to listen to them and share about life, love, recovery, moving on, graduate school, Burning Man, babies (friends who have just had them), and travel plans for Atlanta in July.

My life feels good and full and I feel a part of my community again.

Rather like I am coming out of a shell.

“You do the work,” she told me today over coffee at Tart to Tart.  “Since you and I have been working together over the last two years, the amount of work you have done is formidable, you really show up and do it.”

“Being humble is also acknowledging that, not just the defects, but the assets, you have changed and it’s pretty amazing to witness.”

Thank God.

I will admit I was nervous.

I can isolate and get disconnected to easily.

I can live in my little space, with my laptop and pretend to know what’s going on and feel content being connected via social media, but it is not a tangible experience, I’m not touching real people, hearing the timbre of their voices, the emotions and the longing to live and love and learn.

I got a good healthy dose of my people today and it was just what I needed.

From a number of different communities and fellowships I get to be a part of.

“You really get into that, don’t you,” a fellow asked me today as we were folding up metal chairs and stacking them in a corner of the room.

“Burning Man?” I asked, “yeah, I love it, it’s hard not to and I am really excited to get to go again this year.”

Super excited.

And my little cache of Burning Man supplies is slowly growing.

Each week I am buying one or two small things, spreading out the spending over the next couple of weeks so I don’t take the hit all at one, and I picked up a couple of little things at the grocery store.

I was able to sneak in a run on Safeway and one to Other Avenues and placed my first order with Instacart to be delivered tomorrow.

I was too tight on time to do all the grocery shopping today I needed to do and since the first delivery is free, well, sign me up.

The fewer things I have to haul on my bicycle the better.

Not that it felt like too much of an issue today, I felt really good in my body, strong and light and quick on my bike.

Up to the Inner Sunset for a while, back to the Outer Sunset over to Safeway on the Richmond side, a quick jaunt on Great Highway, passed by the beach and back, and then home.

I did some cooking and had a really nice meal at home.

Red butter lettuce wraps with sautéed ground turkey with onions, garlic, ginger, zucchini, mushrooms, and brown rice, topped with diced English cucumber.

So good.

I filled my belly, ate an apple for dessert, drank some tea and hopped in the shower.

All prepped and fed and polished and shined up and then I got to play some dress up and put on my outfit for the evening’s merriment.

I wore my new dress, fishnets, my fascinator I made last year for Burning Man but never wore out on the playa, put my goggles around my thigh as a garter belt, and piled my hair in a messy up do with more feathers and black glittered roses, a bit of makeup, a pink glitter lip, and a mask.


Masquerade Ball preview

Masquerade Ball preview



I love playing dress up.

Don’t tell.

I had a few mis-fires putting it all together.

But when it happened.

It happened.

“You look amazing!” A woman said to me as we passed by heading into the will call line at NIMBY for our tickets.

“So do you!” We stopped and swapped smart phones and took some photos of each other then went in and got silly dancing.

And in the crush of people heading out from one room to the outdoor area where Serpent Mother was lit up and spitting hot pink neon fire agains the crisp midnight blue sheet of a sky, I heard my name hollered out and was crushed in a gigantic hug.


They are so good to have.

I hadn’t seen him since the night I went out to dance my tears away after my ex had broken our relationship off.

I was celebrating a milestone, ten years in the intensive care unit, with some friends at Public Works.

I was not really in the spirit that night, still crushed by the wall of emotions I was trying to keep at bay, to be present and celebrate the ten-year anniversary and to let my friends love me while I grieved the short, but intense relationship I had just been relieved of being in.



It felt like celebration.

It tasted like red velvet fire cake and smelled of playa, soft, sweet, dusty, and popcorn, and just a touch on the nostalgia side of town, with a nice big dash of anticipation for this years event.

“Take the hugging to another area!” A loud bark of a voice jovially ushered us out into the courtyard.

Unexpected Reunion

Reuniting with playa friends is the best

We paused, caught up, swapped photos and then meandered off into the night.

He caught up with his friends.

I went with mine.

Dancing happened.

Then more dancing.

Then some wandering into the fire effects of The Serpent Mother where I ran into another friend and he lit up his portion of the Serpent and sent flames shooting into the sky.



All in all it was the most successful of adventures.

And although this last photo is blurry, this was what it felt like.



In my element.




Working It Out

August 30, 2013

Worked a lot today, but also got some time off this evening.

I went out and saw some Burning Man.

But first I went to the Playa Bike Repair.

Thank God.

Otherwise I would not have gotten anywhere near as far out as I did tonight.

I would have moped around the 9 o’clock keyhole and missed the amazing moments I got to have this evening.

The best, again, the Xylophage by the Flaming Lotus Girls.

No pictures for you tonight of the piece, however, my camera was running out of juice–batteries are re-charging as I type, so more photos tomorrow.

This was a good thing.

I had no problem putting down the camera.

Unlike a lot of folks I witnessed out there walking through the playa around the art and not engaging with it, just taking photographs of it.

I suppose I could have some judgements about it, but I am too blissed out, once again to care.

In fact, I have thought a few times tonight that I should just ditch doing the blog and go to bed.

Tomorrow’s start time is 8 a.m. and it is 12:45 a.m. and I have only a few words, lots of images, and loads of dust to wash off myself before I crawl into bed.  I probably won’t make it to bed until 2 a.m.

Not the worst thing in the world, I can take a nap tomorrow.

And I promise myself right now that I will.

I am going to stay back tomorrow night so that mom and dad may go out and celebrate a friend’s wedding anniversary.  They also are going to a party, or some other engagement, I don’t recall, sometimes the details of the day get fuzzy when I am warm and fuzzy.

I not only sat in the Xylophage Sequoia stump under the heat, surrounded by the wood smell and the little flaming mushrooms climbing the walls, I also got some body work done while I was sitting there.

There was a sweet older man across the way from me, also sitting and enjoying the warmth, not commenting on “oh my god, it’s hot, wow, it’s like a sauna in here,” ad nauseum, or taking photographs either.

He just sat and watched and smiled across the way at me.

We both sat in our own mutual reverie for about a half hour, then when a break in the crowd happened and there was no one shooting pictures, or video, or waving their Go-Pro around, he made his way over to my side and asked to sit next to me on a stump.

I smiled, I had just gotten a hug from a Bunny from Montreal, how could I refuse?

I moved aside my crinoline and gestured to him.

We introduced ourselves to each other, Ron from Tahoe, doing healing work at HBGBS and Carmen, extreme nanny and reverent worshipper of heat.

“I have to admit I have been waiting to see how long you were going to sit here, I was holding out on leaving until you did.”  He said as he settled down on his perch.

I laughed and we started having a conversation.

The nature of humanity, the proliferation of the camera phone, the posing, the social media, that astounding amount of folks coming through and looking but not necessarily engaging in the art.

He asked me about my tattoos.

I asked him about his Burn.

“May I touch your tattoo?” He asked quietly.

I got no creepy old man vibe off him, just a genuine curiosity to look at the art.

I offered him my arm and the next thing you know he is massaging my hand.  Then, a gentleman walks in through the door next to me, strokes my shoulder and says, “here, let me do this side,” and he tenderly takes my other arm.

I am suddenly engulfed in warmth, love, this sweet boy from Comfort and Joy and this kind soul from HBGB and my water bottle.

If there had been a pillow I would have fallen asleep like a little kitty cat.

Speaking of which.

You know you have a really great mama boss when she says, “you need to see this art piece, I have time before my next meeting, we’re going to head out to Man Base.”

We drive over after lunch and go to the Alien Vending Machine.

It is a little grey and silver box with tokens that you plug into the slot, turn knobs, and small envelopes with instructions printed on the back.

I giggled, picked up the tokens, popped them into the vending machine and pulled the lever.  My little brown envelope dropped out and I fished it through the slot.

“Dear Earthling, we are observing you, please be advised, we are requesting that you be noisy.”

There was a little business card with a lion on the front.

“Please roar until you get the response noted on the back, and remember, we are watching.”

I walked away and roared.

I laughed out loud.

When I got back to the Soccer Mom (the white mini-van) the mama asked me what I got and I roared at her, she giggled and meowed out the window at me.

You want to know what the reverse side of the card said?

“Continue roaring until you meet a person who meows at you, you will have found your person.”


It was the perfect little sobriquet in my day.

How awesome is it that I have a boss that says, let’s take a moment and see some art.

I am remembering a family I once nannied for and how they had no art on their walls and no plants and no fun, frankly, and thanked the heavens above for such an awesome boss.

A boss I later burst into tears in front of at the Commissary.

I was trying to figure it out, and had not even realized it when I spoke with her about replacing my Iphone in Reno.

It broke out here.

I suspect it was on its way out, but the playa took it and I need a new phone.

How am I going to move and arrange and fix and contact and do when I get to San Francisco?

Or Oakland.

Or wherever am I going to land.

She totally took a different tack, said, please don’t worry about the phone and I already planned on having you stay over in Reno with us and further at the house in Cole Valley, you’ll sleep in the guest room and do laundry and take a really long bath and then do the next thing.

Look at that.

The Universe stepping in again and taking care of me.

And with that I am out.

I have an early start time and I need to get some sleep.

The Mother Ship has landed and there’s a big party to go to tomorrow.

Man Base

Man Base

%d bloggers like this: