Posts Tagged ‘vacation pay’

The Good News

February 9, 2016

The better news.

The annoying news.

Let me start with the annoying.


Two sick little boys at work.


Four days of fever sick.

I am not feeling the best, but I am so healthy, rarely sick, and what ever it is has not really caught up to me.


I am going in way early tomorrow as the boys will not be in class and the parents have an appointment they need to make.

The mom implored me and I was like, ok, I can be flexible here, I can be of service, I can help out where I can.


I don’t want to get up at 7 a.m.

Oh well.

I will be done early and be able to take care of a few things that I need to take care of.

Like hopping over to Office Depot and picking up a USB cable for my new printer.

I could have swore I had one, but I cannot locate it anywhere, nor my multi-plug extension cord.

I wanted to set up the printer today so that I could do a dry run on my paper and see it printed, I always catch more errors when I am reading straight from the paper than from the screen.

So, even though it’s a bit of a pain in my ass to go into work that early, the day will go by fast and I will be able to go to Office Depot when I get done at 5:30 p.m. and pick up what I need.

I will also be getting an external hard drive.

The 10,748 photographs I have on my hard drive need to go elsewhere.

My computer keeps telling me to delete files to make room.

How about I just get a new drive and pull it all off.

I don’t really know how it all works, but I know that I can ask for help and I have the time to deal with it tomorrow and I am sure I am not the only neophyte that has walked into a store and said, um, I don’t know what to do but I know I need to do something.

The better news?

I’m going to have a short day on Monday.

The annoying news there.

I am still going in early.

In fact, earlier than I will be going in tomorrow.

9:30 a.m. tomorrow.

9 a.m. on Monday.


I’ll be at a speaking engagement late on Sunday, but it can’t be helped.

The family is going out of town and the mom asked that I come to the house and open it up for the house cleaner.

I said ok.

Even though it’s a holiday for me.

And I really won’t do much Monday but let in the house cleaner, do some homework, maybe go over to Ritual and grab a coffee, and just hang out until the cleaner is done.

I’ll be out of there by 2p.m.


The good news?

That’s it!

I’m done.

Come 2p.m. on Monday I will be done for the week.

The family will be gone on vacation and I will be too.

It’s looking like a “staycation” but that’s cool with me.

I live in a pretty amazing place and the weather has been fantastic.

The family is going to pay me for the time too.

Not the whole week.

But the majority of it and I won’t need to take any vacation days.

I’m saving those for my school retreat in August.

Crazy to already be thinking about that, it’s February, but it’s out there on the horizon and I want to make sure that I am covered for it.

I’m only take one day of pay loss, so it’s rather like working the four day week that I work when I am in school.

It won’t hurt too bad and I will be so happy to have the time off that I don’t mind being flexible and helping the family out.

I have a couple of things happening, but mostly a lot of open space and time to play, rest, and yes, most likely work on some school work as well.

The school work is always in the mix, but I’m holding pretty steady with it and happy to be doing so.

I have thought about going to the DeYoung.

I have thought about going swimming.

I am supposed to explore that and be getting back to my person about that, that little thing I’m balking a bit at, as I was told I probably would.

It’s all about finding the balance and I know it is there.

I may not do as much writing in the morning the days that I am working out.

I’ve thought about the yoga studio at Irving and 46th–literally a 1/2 block from my house.

They have classes, Vinyasa, which I have no experience with, but then again, I have little experience with yoga in general anyway, which would fit my schedule and I could get to three days a week.

My other thought, my housemate got into it last year and has become a convert, is to do some open ocean swimming over at China Beach.


It will be cold.

But it’s swimming and I love swimming.

I could also find a pool to swim in.

I have a vague recollection of there being one somewhat close by.

Anyway, so yeah, investigation for that can occur.

Investigation of many things.

Sleeping in.

Sitting in the sun.

Reading something that is not school related.

As well as plenty that will have to do with school.

A movie matinee?

I haven’t been to a movie in a while.

A ferry ride to Sausalito.

A scooter ride or fifteen.

A massage.

There’s lots to do and I am sure, see, and I am grateful for the opportunity and I am grateful that I get to do all these things, I have options.

I have open time.


And a very heavy handed suggestion to lighten the fuck up.

I will be doing so.

Just got to make it through the week.

One day down.

Six to go.




Go For A Swim!

August 19, 2015


You haven’t gotten into the pool yet?

Go for a swim!

When your person, the person that I check in with almost daily, meet with weekly (except when I am out-of-town with work or Burning Man), and trust implicitly says get into the pool.


I thought about it.

Then a dear friend and I chatted this early evening and when I told him the same thing I could hear it too in his voice, what the hell am I am waiting for.


You see, I have a lot of reading to do and some papers to write, like four, I think, could be five, but let’s not talk about that quite yet, and I have things to think about and worry about and why, I’m quite the person for self-abnegation, why the hell would I do something I like to do.

I could feel the disinclination to want to do it.

I was balking.

I don’t know why, perhaps some sense of I just don’t have time to enjoy that stuff.

I must always be doing the working and the things and the figuring it out.

And oh what the fuck.

I got into the pool.

It was preceded by a pretty honest and open communication with the family I currently nanny for in regards to the discussion that was had about my not getting paid vacation pay for going to Burning Man and I re-iterated to the mom that I understood her viewpoint, I was taken aback, that I had gone back over the contract and that I saw she was right.

I can be happy or I can be right.

I am not right.

Nor was I very happy when the initial conversation happened.

That being said, I saw my part so fast it was sort of spooky.

I saw where I assume, I saw what happens when I make assumptions, I saw what happens when I act out of fear and don’t have clear communication.

I saw it all and again, the mom was right.

Was I still a little pissed at myself this morning when I woke up?

Damn skippy.

I wrote, I prayed, I ate a healthy abstinent breakfast, I took the time to make some phone calls and I did another spot check inventory then called my person.

Who was perfect and clear and blunt, but not mean.

She knows how the fuck to communicate.

I hear her so well and it was good to have the talk and get grounded and get my principle for today, which was “just for today” and it was soothing to hear her and be on track with my life and job and recovery.

The recovery piece has been a little bumpy since I haven’t had my normal menu of places to be and church basements to sit in, since I have not been around a metal folding chair and some over cooked coffee in a few days.

I have been a touch self-reliant with my program, doing the deal on my own, but also checking in with my friends and fellows and making myself available to be checked in with by my lady bugs, confirming with them that I will be in San Francisco this weekend.

Which reminds me I have one more phone call to return, I just remembered there’s one I haven’t slotted into the schedule.


It was good to touch base and be held accountable and see how my perceptions are skewed and what I can do to rectify that.

Get into the pool


You mean, get out of my head and into my body!


I haven’t ridden my bicycle in a week and a half.

I haven’t done much exercise, not nearly enough.

I have been sitting a lot and reading a lot and processing a fuck load when I was in school and the only exercise I got was a few dance exercises (which thank fucking God that happened when it happened or I might not have made it through that last day of T-Group) and walking to and from the dining hall.

I knew when I had a cup of tea after dinner and was on the phone with a friend that I needed to out myself.

I wasn’t really in the mood at the time of the phone call either having just finished dinner and sitting on the porch swing looking out towards the rolling hills of Sonoma county and the grape vines tiled along the hillocks, the glint of sun on the underbelly of a red-tailed hawk soaring high in the dusky blue sky, the oak trees bending into the twilight and the rising song of crickets in the grass serenading me.



I don’t feel like changing up and putting on my swimsuit.


One little three-year old came out to snuggle in my lap, then the five-year old, the mom came out and dad and the next thing you know we are having an open conversation about what we can do moving forward and if I felt that it was unfair not to be given some sort of compensation for the week I’ll be missing work (I’m not even talking about getting paid for the two days extra, well, extra in my calculations, not in theirs) while I am at Burning Man.

The funny thing?

I had pretty much forgot the whole thing by the end of the day.

I was enjoying being in the moment with the boys, we went black berry picking and had a really nice walk and lots of snuggling and being silly with each other and time on the porch swing too.

I had legitimately let it go and had moved on.

Fucking unreal.



The mom and dad and I talked about moving forward, when my contract was ending, what they wanted to try, not signing another year-long contract, but giving all parties a two month trial as I enter into graduate school and see what works for them and what works for them.


I just re-read that in my editing.  “What works for them and what works for them.” How amazing, I am still, unconsciously deciding my life on what works for them.


End aside.  And I’m keeping that piece in un-edited to remind myself that this is not about what works for them, but what works for me.

Now aside ending.

That maybe I would work extra household stuff, marketing and cooking and organizing while the boys were in school, to look at what I wanted for hours and that they would guarantee I got them and if I worked less, as they didn’t need me, or I had to take more time for school, that during those two months, my pay would stay the same.

Super generous.

And it felt right.

I said my gut wanted thirty hours a week.

My head wants 35 hours.

But I think I want a guarantee of 30 hours and if I need to supplement I can say so.

I can also work outside the family and do cash jobs, baby sitting gigs for families I used to work for.

Maybe just put it out there in my circles.

I don’t also have to stay with the family, I am aware too, though I did not say that to them, that I have options and if it seemed that I would do better financially to find  different situation that plays better, that I go with it.


I am the only person who is going to care for me.

Though I have been assured by some lovely friends that I will be taken care of no matter what.

I believe that too.

I always have been, why the hell would it change now?

I also asked for a raise come my year.

The mom balked.

She replied that it was not standard to give a raise to someone who was going down in hours.

In fact, she intimated that when that happens the person involved makes less money.

I was taken a bit aback, but I reiterated that it was a year, that it felt right to ask for a raise, and that despite my hours lessening, and not exactly by my choice (they’re children are going into school), that my level of care and the quality of my work was not going to decrease.

We left it at that.

I also found this good information to know moving forward.

I’m not going to cut off my nose to spite my face, but I do deserve a raise and I felt it appropriate to bring it up.

They want me to continue working for them, I adore and love the boys, it could be the best of both worlds, I am just not going to not look at all my options, as again, I’m the one paying my rent in San Francisco.

I don’t see cost of living going down any time soon.

I felt good.

I communicated.

We will have another discussion.

And I went back to my room and put on my swim suit and got into the pool.

Into my body, out of my head, and my heart swelled and the old familiar comfort of swimming assuaged me and I felt connected with my body and limbs again and resolved that I would swim again every night while I am here.

Then I took a bath with French sea salts I found in the cabinet and soaked in super hot water.

I almost fell asleep in the tub!

I did good.

And I read for an hour after getting out of the bath–putting me at two hours of reading today–finishing up the reading that I needed to do for a class so that I could move into writing the paper for it.

Not too shabby for a Tuesday.

It’s nice to be reminded to take care of myself.

It’s nicer when I actually do.

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